Post by Harkovast on Dec 16, 2014 0:56:22 GMT
You will notice that on my forums I enjoy insulting the works of others, but the more observant amongst you will have observed that I don't go around insulting other peoples webcomics.
Being a comic creator myself, I think it would suggest an arrogance and sense of self superiority to run down others work without being solicited for an opinion first.
So unless the creator asks me to give my thoughts, I will always avoid publicly criticising another webcomic.
Cartoon shows though?
Those are fair game.
Especially animated series that people were expected to pay actual currency for.
Which brings us neatly to CAD: The Animated Series.
Here ya go, why not watch an episode so you will be able to relate to what I am saying. Don't worry you won't have to pay, we are all going to watch it on youtube like the dirty rascals we are.
Click here to watch the first episode of the show
Now let me try to use my sinister mind reading powers and work out what you are thinking.
Hmm, I think I can narrow it down to one of three main responses.
1- What is this shit?
2- This is like watching family guy in slow motion with all the jokes removed.
3- I hope Hark isn't expecting me to watch a whole episode.
CAD features 3 main characters-
Ethan- Our hero. Ethan is a Mary-Sue of epic proportions. Whenever he is not on screen all the other characters talk about him and his hijinks constantly. He is a socially inept moron who treats everyone around him like crap.
The other characters bizarrely seem to tolerate this behaviour, continuing to feed and shelter Ethan no matter how badly he behaves or how dangerous he may be to himself or others. Even his employers just roll their eyes and sigh when he shows up to work hours late or just sits and plays games all day while at his job.
Ethan is meant to be lovable and whacky, interspersing everything he does with some moronic behaviour such as covering himself in butter or smashing objects in a gym by putting them on the treadmill and watching them fly off.
Ethan is, in summary, an irritating little shit that makes you want to stand on his neck just to make him shut up.
Ethan's best friend-I cant remember this guys name, and I cant be bothered to check. His personality basically consists of rolling his eyes at stupid shit Ethan does.
He tolerates Ethans idiocy for no discernable reason to the point of actually living with Ethan and his girl friend.
This bizarre relationship is never explained, but you can probably find more entertainment in trying to make your own hilarious explanations for this set up than from watching the show. Three way marriage? Secret gay affair? You decide.
Ethan's girl friend- An irritatingly idealised girl friend for Ethan. She seems to acknowledge that he is stupid, helpless and is incapable of doing anything on his own aside from leach off others. Despite this, she continues to go out with him, even declaring her intention to marry him. It feels a bit like she is doing some sort of community service, or maybe she has some sort of black mail over her. The same could be used as an explanation for the voice acting of who ever is playing this chick. She sounds like she is rapidly losing the will to live with each line of emotionless, leaden dialogue she deliverers. Seriously, you could walk around a super market, stopping random women and asking them to record some lines and in about an hour you could find a better performance than this one.
The girlfriend is a girl gamer...yes can you believe such a thing? An actual girl who plays VIDEO GAMES! No way! It can't be! With boobz and everything! LOLS!
If you didn't find the above concept outrageous and hilarious then this character isn't going to be very entertaining for you.
Each episode features a very long intro, which features much, much better animation than the rest of the show. I suppose that would explain why they feel the need to replay it in full every time. It's 45 seconds long (including the annoying little "blind ferret entertainment" message that goes with it and then another 40 seconds of credits at the end, that makes 1 minute 25 seconds wasted every episode. That might not sound too bad until I point out that the average episode is about 5 and a half minutes long. That means just over 20% of each episode is taken up with stock footage.
The start of the episodes are actually pretty useful as they provide a good guide for the level of humour we can expect from the show.
Gags such as "a woman is talking, Ethan ignores her and instead grabs her boob so she hits."
No really. That was the joke.
It's not ironic or anything. That set up is honestly meant to be funny.
It may be an idiotic, unoriginal, sexist appeal to the lowest denominator, but at least it moves by at a brisk pace.
We only get a few moments of gags about boobs before we move on to a gag of the friend rolling his eyes, to a gag of nerds being amazed at a girl gamer and staring at her breasts to a sequence of ethan throwing toast at a wall because he is so "random".
I wish I knew more people who paid to see this show, I really do! Knowing idiots who are easily tricked into trading their hard earned money for pointless bullshit would be really useful.
The pace of the show moves like wading through treacle, with every unoriginal joke set up a week in advance and presented in slow, stiff, cheap looking flash animation (with lots of lovely errors like characters vanishing for a moment, a door knob that broke off reappearing then disappearing when there is a cut, missing sound effects and a whole range of other fuck ups that are far funnier then the actual show.)
This show is an empty, pointless, draining affair to watch.
It is sort of fascinating, like a car wreck you cant help but look at.
Anytime you are watching an especially weak episode of Family Guy, or a truly tired late season episode of the Simpsons, I want you to remember CAD:TAS and realise how much worse it could be.
Being a comic creator myself, I think it would suggest an arrogance and sense of self superiority to run down others work without being solicited for an opinion first.
So unless the creator asks me to give my thoughts, I will always avoid publicly criticising another webcomic.
Cartoon shows though?
Those are fair game.
Especially animated series that people were expected to pay actual currency for.
Which brings us neatly to CAD: The Animated Series.
Here ya go, why not watch an episode so you will be able to relate to what I am saying. Don't worry you won't have to pay, we are all going to watch it on youtube like the dirty rascals we are.
Click here to watch the first episode of the show
Now let me try to use my sinister mind reading powers and work out what you are thinking.
Hmm, I think I can narrow it down to one of three main responses.
1- What is this shit?
2- This is like watching family guy in slow motion with all the jokes removed.
3- I hope Hark isn't expecting me to watch a whole episode.
CAD features 3 main characters-
Ethan- Our hero. Ethan is a Mary-Sue of epic proportions. Whenever he is not on screen all the other characters talk about him and his hijinks constantly. He is a socially inept moron who treats everyone around him like crap.
The other characters bizarrely seem to tolerate this behaviour, continuing to feed and shelter Ethan no matter how badly he behaves or how dangerous he may be to himself or others. Even his employers just roll their eyes and sigh when he shows up to work hours late or just sits and plays games all day while at his job.
Ethan is meant to be lovable and whacky, interspersing everything he does with some moronic behaviour such as covering himself in butter or smashing objects in a gym by putting them on the treadmill and watching them fly off.
Ethan is, in summary, an irritating little shit that makes you want to stand on his neck just to make him shut up.
Ethan's best friend-I cant remember this guys name, and I cant be bothered to check. His personality basically consists of rolling his eyes at stupid shit Ethan does.
He tolerates Ethans idiocy for no discernable reason to the point of actually living with Ethan and his girl friend.
This bizarre relationship is never explained, but you can probably find more entertainment in trying to make your own hilarious explanations for this set up than from watching the show. Three way marriage? Secret gay affair? You decide.
Ethan's girl friend- An irritatingly idealised girl friend for Ethan. She seems to acknowledge that he is stupid, helpless and is incapable of doing anything on his own aside from leach off others. Despite this, she continues to go out with him, even declaring her intention to marry him. It feels a bit like she is doing some sort of community service, or maybe she has some sort of black mail over her. The same could be used as an explanation for the voice acting of who ever is playing this chick. She sounds like she is rapidly losing the will to live with each line of emotionless, leaden dialogue she deliverers. Seriously, you could walk around a super market, stopping random women and asking them to record some lines and in about an hour you could find a better performance than this one.
The girlfriend is a girl gamer...yes can you believe such a thing? An actual girl who plays VIDEO GAMES! No way! It can't be! With boobz and everything! LOLS!
If you didn't find the above concept outrageous and hilarious then this character isn't going to be very entertaining for you.
Each episode features a very long intro, which features much, much better animation than the rest of the show. I suppose that would explain why they feel the need to replay it in full every time. It's 45 seconds long (including the annoying little "blind ferret entertainment" message that goes with it and then another 40 seconds of credits at the end, that makes 1 minute 25 seconds wasted every episode. That might not sound too bad until I point out that the average episode is about 5 and a half minutes long. That means just over 20% of each episode is taken up with stock footage.
The start of the episodes are actually pretty useful as they provide a good guide for the level of humour we can expect from the show.
Gags such as "a woman is talking, Ethan ignores her and instead grabs her boob so she hits."
No really. That was the joke.
It's not ironic or anything. That set up is honestly meant to be funny.
It may be an idiotic, unoriginal, sexist appeal to the lowest denominator, but at least it moves by at a brisk pace.
We only get a few moments of gags about boobs before we move on to a gag of the friend rolling his eyes, to a gag of nerds being amazed at a girl gamer and staring at her breasts to a sequence of ethan throwing toast at a wall because he is so "random".
I wish I knew more people who paid to see this show, I really do! Knowing idiots who are easily tricked into trading their hard earned money for pointless bullshit would be really useful.
The pace of the show moves like wading through treacle, with every unoriginal joke set up a week in advance and presented in slow, stiff, cheap looking flash animation (with lots of lovely errors like characters vanishing for a moment, a door knob that broke off reappearing then disappearing when there is a cut, missing sound effects and a whole range of other fuck ups that are far funnier then the actual show.)
This show is an empty, pointless, draining affair to watch.
It is sort of fascinating, like a car wreck you cant help but look at.
Anytime you are watching an especially weak episode of Family Guy, or a truly tired late season episode of the Simpsons, I want you to remember CAD:TAS and realise how much worse it could be.