Post by Harkovast on Jan 17, 2015 16:39:56 GMT
Alright, confession time.
I'm just going to come out and say it.
I think Stanley Kubrick is over rated.
Yeah, there you go! I said it!
Clockwork Orange was total balls. The acting was laughably over the top, all the characters were utterly unlikeable (both criminals and victims) and the plot was utterly contrived. After he gets made so he cant do violence he runs into literally every person he abused, one after the other in order?
And the moral didn't even make any sense. When people get out of prison, do their victims all line up to taunt them because if the x-con retaliated he will go away to prison for even longer? Any argument about free will doesn't make any sense either. In normal society you DON'T have the freedom to rape and murder people! That's why we have police! The idea of a treatment that renders convicted violent people unable to be violent sounds great. I literally can't see any problem. I don't go around being violent and neither does anyone I know, and if I did society would already punish me and lock me away. Is the idea that if you we take away murderers ability to murder they wont b able to defend themselves if their victims families want pay back? That seems to be the only problem with the program.
Also I refuse to like a movie where every character can be summed up with a two words description that covers their entire personality and role in the movie.
The sleazy politician, the shouty prison warden etc etc.
Clockwork Bollocks.
2001 A Space Odyssey had some great visuals, I will grant you that.
But it was just so fucking boring!
Those monkeys were fighting each other with bits of bone for about 20 minutes!
The first time I saw it I got bored during the sequence where the guy is flying through some kinda multi coloured light tunnel and it keeps going to close ups on his eye.
I left the room (cause I was bored) came back in 10 minutes later and it was STILL GOING ON! I was astounded! How can this be called entertaining?
If you actually break down the story very little happens in the movie. They go out to big black thing in space, computer goes nuts and starts trying to kill them, then the guy turns into a big space baby. That's really all there is. The movie just takes a very long time to tell it.
The Shinning was the Kubrick film I liked the most, but it was ruined by one unbelievably stupid shot at the end.
There was a cool bit where Jack gradually collapses as he freezes to death in the hedge maze.
But then (and this is a directorial decision so 100% Kubrick's fault) we cut to this-
Why? Why do we need to see that?
We already knew Jack was dead, its not like we needed confirmation.
And just look at him! He looks ridiculous! A dramatic, tense sequence is capped off with an image that makes you laugh out loud!
A movie that made everything ambigious and uncertain feels the need to spell everything out at the end in the most stupid way possible.
I never saw Eyes Wide Shut...but I heard it sucked.
Alright, so at this point I have probably convinced you that I am a tasteless asshole and you should disregard all my ignorant opinions.
Well maybe you don't like my opinions but that's why they are called opinions- because I'm right and the rest of you will one day realise my greatness.
Or something like that.
So lets get on to our feature presentation, shall we?
The final Kubrick film before his death....
A.I.
Due to Kubrick failing to be alive, the film was finished by Steven Spielberg . A lot of people attacked the film's sappy elements, saying Spielberg had added them to Kubrick's vision. Spielberg insists the opposite is true and he actually added the more serious, darker bits, so I guess I will take Spielberg at his word. Neither he nor Kubrick bothered to add many good bits to the movie, so who was responsible for which bullshit doesn't let either of them off the hook.
The film is about a future where the planets in a bit of a state, due to the rising sea levels and global warming.
The movie keeps making mention that humans are dying off and declining, though the actual human society we see doesn't seem to have any problems.
They have super advanced technology, plenty of food, enough resources to dedicate an entire city to hookers (with a giant building shaped like a naked lady that you enter by...well you can imagine.) If the plot was that humans had become infertile that would make more sense, but they went with the enviromental thing to be topical.
Humans have built robots to do various tasks for them, (though I am going to guess you figured that out from the title.)
One family, who have a son in a comer, get a new special robot young boy.. He's special because he has been programmed to feel love. He will imprint on his mother and then love her like a child. This means he will creepily obsess about her and spend all his time trying to find her, make her be with him, make her love him and will violently attack rivals to her affection.
Now, if you aren't a psychopath, you might be thinking that doesn't sound much like love. It sounds more like a the obsession of an abusive partner in a very unhealthy relationship...and you would be correct.
The film stumbles almost immediately because it keeps banging on about love, but doesn't seem to know what love is.
Love is about caring about someone, not obsessing and trying to control them.
The failure to understand what love is renders the whole message here warped and empty.
What's more, the film also fucks up its understanding of intelligence.
The robo kid decides to seek out the Blue Fairy from Pinocchio to turn him into a real boy so his 'mother' will want him. Alright, he's meant to be a kid so I suppose they programmed him dumb to go with that, that's fair enough, that's not what I have a problem with.
The problem is that when he follows this mission obsessively till it leads him to his creator, and his creator acts as if this proves that he has developed true intelligence.
Ummm...no it doesn't.
You programmed him to obsess and he carried out that program.
If you had programmed him to eat cheese and stand on his head he would have done that too.
That's just an unthinking machine mindlessly carrying out the single purpose you built it for.
Intelligence would have been if he had broken his programming and made his own decision about what he wanted. If he had realised that his love was just a program that had been forced on him and decided he wanted more for himself, that would be impressive. Doing exactly what he was programmed to do? All that proves is you made a robot that is good at finding things you program it to seek.
This kid could have been a prototype for the terminator (now that would have been a plot twist!), a single minded machine that absolutely will not stop until you are dead...I mean you love him!
If you think I am over playing how creepy this uncanny valley delving kid gets, consider this scene.
When he finds his creator he finds another robot boy exactly like himself. This second version is friendly to him, but the robo kid flips out because he wants him mother to himself and won't accept that he is not unique.
Firstly, if you truly have intelligence someone having the same physical appearance and design as you does not make you not unique (identical twins, ever heard of em?) An intelligent being is more than just the sum of the parts it was built with.
Secondly, the movie makes a big deal about how the robots have thoughts and are intelligent and their 'lives' have value....then has the lead character robot up and murder one and then act like its not a big deal. Way to stay on message.
A theme of the film is the machines will eventually replace humans, but since the machines each only have one mindless obsession that defines their entire personality that they can't vary from or abandon. If the humans all died these machines seem like they would just keep repeating their programmed functions until their batteries ran down and they fell to bits.
There is a strange cult/circus that shows up part way through the movie called a Flesh Fair, who smash up robots who they seem to hate for some reason.
Since the robots clearly don't have any personalities or ideas of their own, wanting to destroy them doesn't seem to make any sense. It feels like someone wanting to smash up their toaster. I guess maybe if they were angry if robots replaced them at their jobs? But that's not the impression the film gives. It seems they just hate robots for being artificial.
The whole theme of this film just feels confused and unclear and ultimately meaningless.
And then, out of no where, comes the ending.
The robo kids gets trapped under the sea infront of a statue of a blue fairy and is stuck there praying for two thousand years (stay with me, this really happens.)
In the mean time a new ice age has started and the robots have some how advanced into super intelligent beings that can do magic.
What kind of magic, you ask?
Well they can bring the kids mum back to life for one day, during which she wont know she's died or that any time has passed. After that she will die again and their will be no way to bring her back again.
Now if that aint a magic spell, I don't know what is!
Now I am man enough to admit that the ending, where the little kid gets to be with him mum made me tear up a bit, but that's because it is about the most emotionally manipulative thing ever put on screen. Okay yeah, a little kid gets to be with him mum for one day and then they both die, that's about as tear jerking a thing as you can put on screen.
But like the Flesh Fair earlier, it's tagged on and doesn't fit with the tone or style of the rest of the movie.
Suddenly a contrived fairly tale ending bolts itself onto the back of a sci fi.
I'm still not a 100% sure I believe Spielberg when he says that ending wasn't his idea.
This film is pretentious but meaningless, with a confused setting and themes that render everything its trying to say pointless, and then ends on on emotionally manipulative magic ass pull ending.
And Kubrick was a hack.
I'm just going to come out and say it.
I think Stanley Kubrick is over rated.
Yeah, there you go! I said it!
Clockwork Orange was total balls. The acting was laughably over the top, all the characters were utterly unlikeable (both criminals and victims) and the plot was utterly contrived. After he gets made so he cant do violence he runs into literally every person he abused, one after the other in order?
And the moral didn't even make any sense. When people get out of prison, do their victims all line up to taunt them because if the x-con retaliated he will go away to prison for even longer? Any argument about free will doesn't make any sense either. In normal society you DON'T have the freedom to rape and murder people! That's why we have police! The idea of a treatment that renders convicted violent people unable to be violent sounds great. I literally can't see any problem. I don't go around being violent and neither does anyone I know, and if I did society would already punish me and lock me away. Is the idea that if you we take away murderers ability to murder they wont b able to defend themselves if their victims families want pay back? That seems to be the only problem with the program.
Also I refuse to like a movie where every character can be summed up with a two words description that covers their entire personality and role in the movie.
The sleazy politician, the shouty prison warden etc etc.
Clockwork Bollocks.
2001 A Space Odyssey had some great visuals, I will grant you that.
But it was just so fucking boring!
Those monkeys were fighting each other with bits of bone for about 20 minutes!
The first time I saw it I got bored during the sequence where the guy is flying through some kinda multi coloured light tunnel and it keeps going to close ups on his eye.
I left the room (cause I was bored) came back in 10 minutes later and it was STILL GOING ON! I was astounded! How can this be called entertaining?
If you actually break down the story very little happens in the movie. They go out to big black thing in space, computer goes nuts and starts trying to kill them, then the guy turns into a big space baby. That's really all there is. The movie just takes a very long time to tell it.
The Shinning was the Kubrick film I liked the most, but it was ruined by one unbelievably stupid shot at the end.
There was a cool bit where Jack gradually collapses as he freezes to death in the hedge maze.
But then (and this is a directorial decision so 100% Kubrick's fault) we cut to this-
Why? Why do we need to see that?
We already knew Jack was dead, its not like we needed confirmation.
And just look at him! He looks ridiculous! A dramatic, tense sequence is capped off with an image that makes you laugh out loud!
A movie that made everything ambigious and uncertain feels the need to spell everything out at the end in the most stupid way possible.
I never saw Eyes Wide Shut...but I heard it sucked.
Alright, so at this point I have probably convinced you that I am a tasteless asshole and you should disregard all my ignorant opinions.
Well maybe you don't like my opinions but that's why they are called opinions- because I'm right and the rest of you will one day realise my greatness.
Or something like that.
So lets get on to our feature presentation, shall we?
The final Kubrick film before his death....
A.I.
Due to Kubrick failing to be alive, the film was finished by Steven Spielberg . A lot of people attacked the film's sappy elements, saying Spielberg had added them to Kubrick's vision. Spielberg insists the opposite is true and he actually added the more serious, darker bits, so I guess I will take Spielberg at his word. Neither he nor Kubrick bothered to add many good bits to the movie, so who was responsible for which bullshit doesn't let either of them off the hook.
The film is about a future where the planets in a bit of a state, due to the rising sea levels and global warming.
The movie keeps making mention that humans are dying off and declining, though the actual human society we see doesn't seem to have any problems.
They have super advanced technology, plenty of food, enough resources to dedicate an entire city to hookers (with a giant building shaped like a naked lady that you enter by...well you can imagine.) If the plot was that humans had become infertile that would make more sense, but they went with the enviromental thing to be topical.
Humans have built robots to do various tasks for them, (though I am going to guess you figured that out from the title.)
One family, who have a son in a comer, get a new special robot young boy.. He's special because he has been programmed to feel love. He will imprint on his mother and then love her like a child. This means he will creepily obsess about her and spend all his time trying to find her, make her be with him, make her love him and will violently attack rivals to her affection.
Now, if you aren't a psychopath, you might be thinking that doesn't sound much like love. It sounds more like a the obsession of an abusive partner in a very unhealthy relationship...and you would be correct.
The film stumbles almost immediately because it keeps banging on about love, but doesn't seem to know what love is.
Love is about caring about someone, not obsessing and trying to control them.
The failure to understand what love is renders the whole message here warped and empty.
What's more, the film also fucks up its understanding of intelligence.
The robo kid decides to seek out the Blue Fairy from Pinocchio to turn him into a real boy so his 'mother' will want him. Alright, he's meant to be a kid so I suppose they programmed him dumb to go with that, that's fair enough, that's not what I have a problem with.
The problem is that when he follows this mission obsessively till it leads him to his creator, and his creator acts as if this proves that he has developed true intelligence.
Ummm...no it doesn't.
You programmed him to obsess and he carried out that program.
If you had programmed him to eat cheese and stand on his head he would have done that too.
That's just an unthinking machine mindlessly carrying out the single purpose you built it for.
Intelligence would have been if he had broken his programming and made his own decision about what he wanted. If he had realised that his love was just a program that had been forced on him and decided he wanted more for himself, that would be impressive. Doing exactly what he was programmed to do? All that proves is you made a robot that is good at finding things you program it to seek.
This kid could have been a prototype for the terminator (now that would have been a plot twist!), a single minded machine that absolutely will not stop until you are dead...I mean you love him!
If you think I am over playing how creepy this uncanny valley delving kid gets, consider this scene.
When he finds his creator he finds another robot boy exactly like himself. This second version is friendly to him, but the robo kid flips out because he wants him mother to himself and won't accept that he is not unique.
Firstly, if you truly have intelligence someone having the same physical appearance and design as you does not make you not unique (identical twins, ever heard of em?) An intelligent being is more than just the sum of the parts it was built with.
Secondly, the movie makes a big deal about how the robots have thoughts and are intelligent and their 'lives' have value....then has the lead character robot up and murder one and then act like its not a big deal. Way to stay on message.
A theme of the film is the machines will eventually replace humans, but since the machines each only have one mindless obsession that defines their entire personality that they can't vary from or abandon. If the humans all died these machines seem like they would just keep repeating their programmed functions until their batteries ran down and they fell to bits.
There is a strange cult/circus that shows up part way through the movie called a Flesh Fair, who smash up robots who they seem to hate for some reason.
Since the robots clearly don't have any personalities or ideas of their own, wanting to destroy them doesn't seem to make any sense. It feels like someone wanting to smash up their toaster. I guess maybe if they were angry if robots replaced them at their jobs? But that's not the impression the film gives. It seems they just hate robots for being artificial.
The whole theme of this film just feels confused and unclear and ultimately meaningless.
And then, out of no where, comes the ending.
The robo kids gets trapped under the sea infront of a statue of a blue fairy and is stuck there praying for two thousand years (stay with me, this really happens.)
In the mean time a new ice age has started and the robots have some how advanced into super intelligent beings that can do magic.
What kind of magic, you ask?
Well they can bring the kids mum back to life for one day, during which she wont know she's died or that any time has passed. After that she will die again and their will be no way to bring her back again.
Now if that aint a magic spell, I don't know what is!
Now I am man enough to admit that the ending, where the little kid gets to be with him mum made me tear up a bit, but that's because it is about the most emotionally manipulative thing ever put on screen. Okay yeah, a little kid gets to be with him mum for one day and then they both die, that's about as tear jerking a thing as you can put on screen.
But like the Flesh Fair earlier, it's tagged on and doesn't fit with the tone or style of the rest of the movie.
Suddenly a contrived fairly tale ending bolts itself onto the back of a sci fi.
I'm still not a 100% sure I believe Spielberg when he says that ending wasn't his idea.
This film is pretentious but meaningless, with a confused setting and themes that render everything its trying to say pointless, and then ends on on emotionally manipulative magic ass pull ending.
And Kubrick was a hack.