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Post by wordweaver3 on Nov 9, 2018 22:07:18 GMT
I have this strange feeling that I've put that up before.
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Post by Horsie on Nov 11, 2018 0:35:15 GMT
I don't think you have, I'd remember that opening scene. Which is weird, because it seems familiar.
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Post by Canuovea on Nov 11, 2018 0:41:08 GMT
I think I know someone who worked on that.
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Post by wordweaver3 on Nov 11, 2018 1:32:56 GMT
I think it was uploaded in Dolby and that's why the sound is weird. I think I know someone who worked on that.
It would be cool to get some inside perspective on the movie, cuz it's pretty infamous.
I actually saw this one in the theater with an ex gf. We ended up being really late for the movie we intended to go and see. We didn't want to pay to miss the first 15 minutes and we didn't want to wait 2 hours for the next showing. We picked WoV based only on the name and the very vague poster in the lobby.
Which doesn't say a god-damn thing about kangaroos.
It was only when I left the theater that I noticed the very stylized red roo in the middle.
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Post by Harkovast on Nov 11, 2018 22:39:12 GMT
Warriors of Virtue? No.
So anyway...Gor! Gor was the books where all the women become sex slaves and its all some pervy bondage fetish, wasn't it? Is this that?
Well we've got a classic big hair 80's warrior chick. Modern warrior chicks are not as cool as they were in the 80's its a sad truth. This woman is distracting me with how big her...hair is.
Did you notice that in the rpg my warrior squirrel chick looked like a 1980's fitness instructor? Yeah, that's cause 80's warrior chicks rule.
Okay so he accidentally travels to another dimension by running his car into a tree. I like that he goes to the barbarian world, rather than them coming to our world. I hate when they come to our world, our world sucks! Canon film got it right here, then they fucked it up with masters of the universe! Lots of awkward sword fighting, leading to our hero proving that he is able to kill trained bad guy soldiers somehow. Are people in this world just shit at fighting? After he has been trained they just randomly sneak up and fling spears at him to see if he's ready. Seems a rather...dangerous way to test his skills. If they had just killed him it would have been really embarrassing!
I like Canon films and I don't care what anyone thinks! They are wonderful camp nonsense. No one involved ever has a damn clue how to make movies.
When they are out in the desert, a couple of naked black dudes rob them...I ain't saying nothing.
I'm kinda confused why they bothered with the hero guy from our world. Whats the point? its not like the situation is complicated or needs explaining. Its about as simplistic as it could be.
Hang on, why has the hero stopped wearing glasses? Has barbarian training cured his eye sight?
The heroes start discussing what they need and say they need a couple more swords nad maybe a crossbow nad a bow for the woman...why do they need extra swords? Do they just make shitty swords that break all the time on Gor? Why is the tavern in a cave? Gor is weird.
I'm not getting much of the weird gender politics in this that I keep hearing abotu with the books. Its just typical low budget barbarian nonsense. They say women have to be slaves and stuff and have dancing girls but that's just what they do in these kind of films. I'm not getting odd world views being pushed. I don't think Canon films are smart enough to have movies with a message to be honest. Even a stupid message. The guy decides to have the slaves girls fight...I guess thats just how people on Gor settle stuff. Hot slave girl fights! He describes this as something he wants, like he just really needs to see these two chicks beat each other up...well what ever floats your boat, I guess.
Damn these ladies are fighting for a long time! Considering how abruptly the battle started, it went on for ages. Wait he didn't give them the map? Then what the was the point of all that?
Oh well the guy comes after them and gets killed anyway. This movie sucks at balancing build up and pay off. Rando slave girl battle goes on for what feels like hours, evil tavern owner guy who has been established as super strong and evil get blinded by a digital watch (they have shiny things on this planet...that's not a very good use of earth tech!) and is stabbed and immediately dies.
Oliver Reed in various silly hats as the bad guy is fun. He gives a lot of gravitas to the nonsense hes reading. Was he drunk during filming? Its Ollie Reed so the odds are almost certainly yes.
I must admit, this film has kind of the barbarian adventure vibe I was going for with the Brorg-doa (Though since I'm imagining it, I can give the Brorg-dao a slightly higher budget!)
Apparently to make this film they didn't actually get the rights but just kinda did some legal gymnastics to get away with it. I have no idea why Canon felt they had to make a Gor film, I guess they just really wanted to. Canon films were fucking cool.
At hte slave market our heroes just seem to pick a fight with the guards. Probably not a great idea! Reed seems very accepting of the idea of someone coming from another world. I guess people come from other worlds all the time on Gor.
Olly Reed is trying to tempt our hero with wine and women and feasting. In real life Reed was pretty much the human incarnation of drunken hedonism, so if he threw a party, I'd want in on that! Now they are breaking out the branding irons, which means it must be a good party.
Honestly at this point I've no real idea whats going on. Why does Reed want to get the hero on his side? He doesnt' seem to have nay special skills or powers. His earth knowledge hasn't proved useful so far.
I think a big difference to the politics of the books is that here all the branding woman and pleasure slave stuff is treated as a bad thing the bad guys do. As I understand in the books its treated as awesome and the women all secretly want it.
If you brand a slave girl you own them, and the hero branded Olly Reed...the implications here are worrying!
Our heroes spend a lot of time getting captured! They escape then get grabbed again immediately! They keep killing a lot f guards though. Being a guard is a terrible job!
Reed is clearly a better actor than everyone else. It feels weirdly out of place. Like if in a comic all the characters were badly drawn except one. It makes the good one feel like the problem. He's doing all this emotion and intonation while everyone else woodenly reads lines. Are the rest of them italians being dubbed? Hahahah his reaction to an arrow to the neck was awesome! And then he falls in a pit and explodes! Nice!
In the final ceremony barbarian chick has the same bikini but now with a red sash and a red head band. I guess bikinnis are expensive.
And then with 5 minutes to go they introduce a new bad guy? Some sinister priest? Why is he messing with the home stone? wont that send him home? I Would at least finish banging the barbarian chick first.
Hold on...so was the evil priest guy important? That didn't go anywhere. Were they setting up for a sequel? Wait what the fuck thats Jack Palance? What the hell is he doing here? Show up as a bonus villain in the last 5 minutes?
Hahaha so then hes back on earth, punches a guy in the face and that makes him get the girl? I guess thats the good Gor gender politics we were waiting for after all!
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Post by Horsie on Nov 12, 2018 2:49:10 GMT
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Post by wordweaver3 on Nov 12, 2018 3:53:22 GMT
I'm so happy someone actually watched that one!
Of course, now that means I have to.
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Post by Harkovast on Nov 12, 2018 8:24:50 GMT
MORE Gor? With Jack Palance? You know I'm there!
But in the mean time...
THE MENACE OF MAGNETO! Written by Stan Lee, this episode of the 1970's fantastic four cartoon shows the original vision of Magneto. Let's get back to the source and how this most complex and conflicted villain was originally supposed to be...
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Post by Harkovast on Nov 12, 2018 20:20:20 GMT
Stan Lee just died today, so I guess I can retroactively claim this is honouring the great mans legacy.
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Post by wordweaver3 on Nov 13, 2018 2:39:46 GMT
Rest in peace Stan "The Man".
I expect some glorious back-issues in the afterlife.
Nuff said.
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Post by wordweaver3 on Mar 24, 2019 22:37:37 GMT
Because unicorns, that's why.
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Post by Horsie on Mar 24, 2019 23:43:23 GMT
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Post by Canuovea on Mar 24, 2019 23:48:09 GMT
If I have time.
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Post by wordweaver3 on Mar 25, 2019 19:06:00 GMT
You have to make time...
...because unicorns.
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Post by wordweaver3 on Mar 26, 2019 4:47:19 GMT
I can't stress how much of a shame it is that there are only two Dr Phibes movies. He is one of the best ant/protagonists characters in cinema history. You can't help but love him and want to see him succeed.
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